Myth #3: Polyamory is a way to avoid commitment Research by Amy Moors, a graduate student at the University of Michigan, finds that people whose relationship style involves little emotional entanglement often say they'd love a polyamorous relationship, thinking that they could have the benefits of coupledom without too much attachment. Joining a polyamorous relationship and thinking it's going to be a commitment-free breeze would likely be a huge mistake.For one thing, plenty of polyamorous relationships are very serious and stable — Holmes says he's interviewed people who've been legally married for 40 years and in a relationship with a second partner for 20.And satisfaction with an outside partner didn't hurt the primary relationship.[6 Scientific Tips for a Successful Marriage] "Polyamorous relationships are relatively independent of one another," Mitchell said in January at the annual meeting of the Society for Personality and Social Psychology in New Orleans.Secondly, successful polyamorous partners communicate relentlessly, Holmes said: "They communicate to death." It's the only way to ensure that everyone's needs are met and no one is feeling jealous or left out in a relationship that involves many people.Myth #4: Polyamory is exhausting The monogamists in the crowd may be shaking their heads.
"What I've come across most is actually configurations of two males and a female living together," Holmes said.
Isn't all that communication and negotiation exhausting?
It's true that polyamorous relationships take lots of time, said Elizabeth Sheff, a legal consultant and former Georgia State University professor who is writing a book on polyamorous families.
and others forming stable bonds among three, four or five partners simultaneously.
The latter is a version of polyamory, relationships in which people have multiple partnerships at once with the full knowledge of all involved.